Wednesday, February 18, 2009

Thank God for Words!

Over the years, in my search to find the true me, I have been forced to look outside of me. Shifting my focus from watching myself to watching others. Like a poem I read on Face book. Where the poet says, the inside me stepped outside of me and watched.
Not in a rude obtrusive way. Not judging or studying. But then paying attention to people around. Trying to hear the words that gets caught somewhere between, their thought and their tongue. Or maybe the unfinished sentence. Or maybe the ominous silence that screams.
Then I also try hard to understand that sideways glance, the twitch of the eyelid that betrays disappointment when the lips part to smile. Sometimes it is sheer joy that comes in a second and disappears, and you wonder if you saw it at all. Then there is the eyes trying to look away, trying not to get caught between a stare afraid to reveal too much.
But that is not all. Then you have your body bending over. Hands reaching out to hug, same time pushing the body away as far as possible, from any real contact. The gesticulating arms trying to replace words. The touch that says everything. When a hand is placed gently on a shoulder when the occassion doesn’t demand it. The gentle pat. The harsh grip that loosens almost immediately, but alas the damage already done.
As my astral body roamed the streets of silent thoughts. I did wonder. Do we need words at all? Will words qualify your thoughts and put that legal stamp which confirms that yes that what you thought you saw in my eyes is exactly what I have to say.
And like the poet scurries back to his inside. I did too. Feeling safer. Inside of me than stepping outside.
The jungle of pregnant thoughts and straying glances. The traffic jam of flaying hands and pursed lips. The hideous shouts and screams of silence and the chocking of the unspoken words....Thank God we have words. It just makes life easier. Camouflages all that intensity which renders us breathless and rushing for air.

13 comments:

Stillness Speaks said...

How beautifully put! I've had similar thoughts but have never been able to pen them as beautifully as you just did! Keep smiling!

Shalini George said...

dear stillness, how i wish i knew your name. thankyou for your presence and your kind words. I will keep smiling, only if you keep viting. After all we are kindred spirits!! ;) :)

Beautiful Life said...

"Simple Joy oh Holy." Beautiful post. Being able to see the beauty, understanding the meaning, and to experience the depth of simple things happening around us is enlightening. I do not think this happens just like that. There is somewhat a beautiful touch deep inside us that makes us to understand this.

Shalini George said...

If not for you Antony. Njan ee pani pande nirthiyittu poyane.
Thanks for being there as always.

Stillness Speaks said...

I got here from Preeti Shenoy's blog. I am smitten by your writing really! Your words have such a calming effect on me :-) My name is Ashima

Shalini George said...

Hello Ashima,
Lovely to meet you. Hope this is a begining of great friendship.

Stillness Speaks said...

I hope so too Ma'm :-)

Anand said...

HEyyy..
How be u? So..wots the true u? Find anything worth checking out? :-)
Loved ur post.
And dont read my latest post btw. It's for MEN ONLY.
Anand. ;-)

mikimbizi said...

Yeh thank God for words.... You've used those lovely things to create a masterpiece here.

"The jungle of pregnant thoughts and straying glances. The traffic jam of flaying hands and pursed lips. The hideous shouts and screams of silence and the chocking of the unspoken words....Thank God we have words. It just makes life easier. Camouflages all that intensity which renders us breathless and rushing for air." - AWESOME !!!!!

dinkan said...

interesting...the final para has great strength of words...do keep writing

Shalini George said...

Thankyou Mikim,
Good 'words' from you works like a stimulator. See! what words can do.

Hello Dinkan,
Glad you found it interesting. Thankyou for your presence. God Bless!

josh said...

Bravo.. the last graph tops it all. Shalini, it's a mighty original thought. Worth more posts. Keep digging. Keep revealing!

Shalini George said...

You think so Josh? but i thought this was pretty common place...don't you think we all have moments we would rather be shouted at? rather than silence that accuses? glances that betrays? gestures that shows disappointments? These leave so much room for the imagination. Gawd! I love words! For it is so limiting...;-)